WHO AM I?

(And What's Going on?)

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I'm afraid I can't answer that for you.

Take your existential dread elsewhere, please.

I don't know who 'you' are, but I can tell you who I am.

My name is PIANO TEETH and I am the voice inside your head. 

I have no skin. At all.

I can't be up there with you and so I live down here in the dark with Jasper the toad.

Due to my lack of skin, I spend a lot of time in the bath, soaking and soothing my skinless sinews and tissues with various potions. It gets quite boring and to pass the time I drink.

Bleach, a lot of bleach.

A few bottles in and my brain cracks, everything melts away and I am plunged into a story. Different every time.

And when I come back up, gasping for air and have put my mind back together, 

I want to share these fantastical tales with you.

Which is why I find myself here, inside your mind. 

Thanks for having me.

And to answer your second question. No-one knows what's going on.

Just enjoy it.

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